Why console FPS games are for Jeremy Kyle contestants

I need to be given some credit on this. Going back 20 years, I had an Amstrad CPC 464. An early Alan Sugar invention. In fact, one of his better inventions when you wonder what Amstrad have bought out over the years- email machines, fax / email machines, hybrid Sega / PC’s. It was a fantastic computer.

My dad was into his computers. So our second one was a Commodore Amiga 500. When you go from early basic graphics, to 16bit, it’s quite a jump. When we first had the Amiga setup, Dad had it hooked up to the TV (and it was a big TV at the time- had you shown me my 50″ 1080p Samsung at that time I’d have fainted). We upgraded to an Amiga 1200. I am to this day a big fan of the Amiga….what a fantastic gaming machine it was. While all my friends had Mega Drives, and a few Super Nintendos, I maintain to this day, my Amiga was far superior.

Then we bought our first PC….and it went on from there. I was hooked on PC gaming.

Then in 1995ish the Playstation, appeared- and I still resisted. I just found it shite. The graphics were substandard. I’d be better off taking a jolly to Skegness and going in the arcades. Those were the graphics.

The PS2 I finally submitted to. And while I had a crap PC (this is going back 8 years) and had no money, it was a cheaper way of gaming while building a good PC wasn’t affordable. MOHAA brings back memories :)

Fast forwarding. I own a PS3, an XBOX 360 and a WII. I play games on them all- albeit not much at the moment. You would NOT play FIFA on a PC. No way, it’s a console game. I do not want to use keys to play against my mates. Go away.

My brother Tom and Lawrie are both avid console freaks. Everytime I call and see my Mum, I can hear TAT TAT AT AT AT AT coming from upstairs. Lawrie is playing Battlefield Heroes. XBOX 360, and it looks utter turd.

Tom is really into COD4 and 5. He’ll play COD6 like a heroin addict when it is released in a month or two. He thinks he’s fantastic as these games, and I say to him.

‘Aim noob’


Going back a few years, I got very very very good at CS 1.6. I am talking playing for hours and having scores of 100/6. It was pure practise and instinct (and vodka). I probably sound big headed, but I was high skilled. I became very very good with the mouse.

Have you tried aiming on an FPS game on the consoles? It’s TERRIBLE. With the mouse, if you are really really good, you SNAP the mouse onto a target and blow their brains out. On the console you laboriously push in the general direction of the opponent. Try it- it’s linear. It’s terrible. It’s low skill.

FPS gaming on consoles is low skill. The controller don’t work for FPS games.

Console gamers would get shat on if they had to use a mouse- they simply don’t have the ability or intelligence.

The irony is that the vast majority are playing console FPS all day long- Jeremy Kyle’s contestants. The real skilled players come out at dark- after work, college or university.

So it would seem the developers are dumbing down gaming. Gaming used to be for geeks. For the intelligent. It’s becoming increasingly for dip-shites.

I am quite sure when I speak to my grandchildren in 40 years time, I’ll be telling them how good gaming used to be :)

Add a comment below and just tell me I am wrong.

This entry was posted in From the office. Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Why console FPS games are for Jeremy Kyle contestants

  1. Marky Cod says:

    This is a really good read! I used to be addicted to gaming growing up. I mean the first ever gaming machine I had was a TV Boy. Remember those? They plugged straight into the TV and had about 150 games on them. Then i moved on to the SEGA and then quickly followed by the PS1.

    My addiction (if you call it that) to gaming started when the PS2 came out. I played the PS2 day in day out until the next gen consoles came out. The TV Boy, Sega, PS1 and PS2 were in my opinion for some reason the best gaming years of my life. Now, im not sure if thats to do with age or just the fact like it says in the article, gaming in the past was “REAL GAMING”

    I mean last half a year I never feel like playing on the xbox 360. The only time i play it is with my mate once or twice aweek, or when we have fifa nights.

    Another thing I picked up in the article is that certain games are for consoles only and some are for PC only. I mean like it says: imagine a fifa night on the PC, all frantically tapping away on keyboards. It just wouldnt work!

    But im not sure of the reason why i dont enjoy gaming as much now. Is it my age, or is it really the fact gaming was better in the past?

  2. Dawn says:

    Haha. Very good read :)

  3. Chris Santry says:

    Project Natal, Olly?

  4. bob says:

    I love reading these types of blogs from you Olly. They make me laugh and cheer me up no end!

    I totally agree that the games that are being put out on the console are just not for a console. I think my first console was a Super Nintendo and remember playing a game with Road Runner (meep meep) in it. Can’t remember for the life of me what it was, but i loved it! I went onto a Sega Megadrive after that and then jumped into computer gaming. I got a PS1 and a PS2 when they came out, but still maintained playing computer gaming as that is what i thought was a better platform for the games that i liked playing. I just upgraded my computer all the time to handle the newer games (P4, P4 HT, Core 2 Duo, Core 2 Quad, i7).

    I now have in my possession a PS1, PS2, XBOX 360, Wii and one of those things that you plug in the TV and play things like Tetris and Pacman. I haven’t invested in a PS3 as i just don’t see a need for me wanting or even needing one. I just beefed up my computer a little more from a Quad core to an i7. Admittedly it would have been cheaper to buy a PS3 than to upgrade the computer, but i feel that i enjoy playing the games FAR more on the computer over the console.

    When i have a gaming night over my mates house, we whip out COD4 and it goes into the 360. I think to myself, just bring out the PS2 and whack SingStar in there and ill have more chance of beating you. Put COD4 into a PC and do the same thing, he will be left there crying with embarrassment due to his diabolically low score.

  5. tinstaafl says:

    Hmm, this is rather topical for me, having just forked out cash for Wolfenstein and Red Faction Guerrilla, both on PC. I played RTCW avidly and got pretty good at it, taking part in clans, etc. The original Red Faction was a proper FPS too, I enjoyed it enough to play it beginning to end several times. So you can imagine my disappointment to discover the most recent incarnations of both games are essentially console ports. I have no issues with porting, technically. I realise that games are expensive to develop and if we want to continue to see good PC shooters this may be necessary. But that does NOT mean that all these games should cater to the – how should I put it, immature desires of the average console player who is likely to be younger and disinterested in teamplay.

    Every game that comes out now has to have “perks” and “upgrades” and perpetual stats. Why? Surely just being good at a game is reward enough and proves to others that you’re a good player, if that really is so important to you. It seems to me that the games developers are are designing games purely for those who become bored so quickly with their new game that they need regular goals and achievements, as well as being able to display their “skills” to other players by waving around unlocked weapons and other perks.

    I sound like an old man! But all I really want is an adult’s game – one where at the start of every game, the playing field is level, everyone is equal and our aim, ability to work with others, occasional self-sacrifice, etc are rewarded with winning the game. Oh, and not having to answer repeated “Are you sure?” messages when navigating menus would be nice! God help these console players when they enter the real world and have to go to work every day to do the same thing over and over again! And if any of them join the armed forces they’ll be dead within 5 minutes with the level of teamplay they display in shooter games :)

  6. dangerousbrian says:

    not played a game console since buying my first pc 7 years ago
    no matter how good they make the graphics in a games console
    us pc addicts will just buy a better card
    you will always be able to upgrade a pc even a laptop these days
    a pc is far more flexible with key binding and the like

    NO consoles left in my house lol


  7. Olly says:

    tinstaafl – you and me both. You aren’t the only angry old man on this one.

    DB- the graphics on the PC have always been, and are always better. People don’t realise that.

    Mike- I love how they call using a Mouse cheating, lol!

  8. Pingback: The Daily INXling - Modernware 2 servers will be a hit on the PC

  9. Opton^ says:

    Now, This entry got to me with the classic steryotypical view of the Console and PC split which exists in the Gaming World.

    As much as the facts are, both Consoles and PC having a very very different community, regardless there are worse sides to both, which regardless is always going to be the case on the lovely internet and each have their way of connection “friends” with each other in Gaming. And sadly its true the PC is easier to get access to a wide range, but then again I myself choose consoles to be entertainment in a solo form

    I don’t see the point of outlining the contrasts of them, due to the fact that I myself am not bigheaded enough to criticize my Console partners, who may I say play at an outstanding professional level in the console world, and the beauty of it, the game changes every so often for them so they get a new experiences regardless of how good they are, being that they are naturally good at all walks of games either way.

    I myself consider to be alright at FPS’s on the PC with my trusty mouse, although I grew up on it, And I know that many avid console players are second-to-nothing with their Controller and enjoy gaming that way, why? Because they are used to it. There are fine changes to enjoying each mouse + controllers in different situations. Countless times I have done many l4d nights on a Xbox for a barrel of laughs because we did not have access to 4 Pcs to enjoy it that way.

    The graphics are just becomming a joke when people call the terrible bluff that consoles are sadly at a lower level, I feel that its an honest load of bull’ mainly because the pick up and play aspect of consoles never ceases to amaze me for the cost, As much as I like having my games top of the range, I understand not to expect my consoles to be “packing” them from the price tag and factor as to why I play.

    Also, won’t also PC gamers be spending a heavy amount of time on the newer FPS releases aswell for some solid days?

    You say “aim noob”
    I myself played Doom3 to a solid good level, along with CSS and Quake 3, and I knew that deep down, luck with shooting always imply to anyone who knows the basics of their FPS engine and are often met with “someone” who is always going to be better than you, console to PC it will happen alot. Unless your the worlds best and you fight to keep there, its pretty futile, So being full of yourself gives you that to obtain higher in your game. Thats what I did, I always said I was amazing, even that little extra bit of confidence went a long way.

  10. paul says:

    i agree with this completely.

    did you know that console games use aimbots because the aiming is so lackluster and shitty that the game must aim for you? I game on my own personally built pc, with a 24″ 1980×1080 monitor. If i am ONE pixel off.. literally one pixel on a long range shot in MW2, i will miss, and die.

    on consoel, i can hip fire from 500 ft and headshot because it auto-aims it for me. its low skill and boring. I hear a few kids on my hall (dorm at college) boating their headshot abilities, so i say “here.. try it on my computer”

    they get MURDERED. im talking 3 kills 40 deaths type of murdered.
    I got a tac nuke using an xbox360 controlled. ive never touched one before. i have a ps3 for fighting games, thats it. low skilled monkeys ;)

  11. Olly says:


    I’m in your fan club.

    Couldn’t put it better myself.

    But try telling that to the low-skill console fan boys eh? :)

  12. Lawrie- Brother of Olly says:

    Olly i know i am i COD addict, but i am limited to an xbox every night. If you get xbox gaming, it has a few shit hosts, shit connections, but it is a battle between xbox, ps3 and PC. it is the same game either way. with a mouse if you see an enemy you learn how you much you need to turn your crosshairs and aim to get him. on an xbox, if you see an enemy, you also LEARN how much you need to turn your crosshairs to get your enemy. if you get me, it doesn’t matter how fast you can turn your crosshairs, it matters how much experience you have of the game. the better players to me, seem to ‘lock on’ to me much more efficiently, the higher their rank. why is this?

  13. alipschitz says:

    I feel like I am “Doing the Robot” everytime I play an FPS on a console. I would think the developers would give players the option to play with a keyboard and a mouse or a game controller. Lobbies could be setup for the two different kinds of input so the online gameplay is balanced. If you use a game controller you will only play with others using game controllers. Same thing with the keyboard and mouse players. I mean,… is this so hard for developers to comprehend?

  14. Pingback: INX Gaming Tutorial: Using the support desk | INX game servers blog

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>